Inaction Required

What if you did nothing about it?

Hi! from a location so remote, I’m shocked I have a hotspot signal. I am parked while I wait for my daughter’s softball game to begin. A/C blasting, sitting in the passenger seat bc writing with a steering wheel in the way does not work. I’m writing to you from my (at last!) new laptop. New Olivia Rodrigo is on low. I’ve reflexively reached for an iced coffee that doesn’t exist at least four times, but aside from that— today is a good day.

Yesterday, and pretty much the whole week— I’ve wondered if I’d unwittingly stepped into some sort of astrological or karmic quicksand. It’s been one of those stretches where every.single.thing feels 10x harder than it should be. In the grand scheme of thing, nothing worth sweatin, just numbingly annoying.

Something that I’ve been working on is noticing how frequently I hand over my power to nuisances and situations beyond my control. A perfectly OK day is suddenly derailed by dumb circumstances or the mindless actions of someone else and: poof! Now I’m handing over my time and energy to circumstances that are completely beyond my control. Here are two things that help:

1) visualise the drip. I’ve written before about my love of visual metaphors to interrupt unwanted patterns, and the ‘drip drip drip’ of a milk carton (or expensive, organic macadamia nut mylk) is a helpful way to pause and stop myself from allowing aggravation to derail me. It’s a good reminder that it’s a choice: my choice. I can let my energy drain down to nothing— or I can consciously stop the drip.

Another thing is 2) asking myself this: what’s the risk of inaction? Will something valuable break or get lost? Will I utterly devastate my family or friends? No? Then often times the most effective thing to do is nothing. Cell phones that are pretty much attached to our bodies create a fake sense of urgency. ‘Someone sent me a message so of course I must respond!” But must I? I sometimes forget (but always come back to) the value of Stephen R. Covey’s four quadrants.

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Dealing with Quadrant 1 calmly, minimizing Quadrant 3 to the best of my abilities and prioritizing and protecting the time I spend in Quadrant 2 is a gangbusters way of going through life. Yes, I’m aware of how throwback 90s corporate / pocket protector this may sound, but it’s a legendary matrix for a reason.

Let’s try to make it a quadrant 2 summer. Deal?

• 68 thoughts about Toy Story 5. I saw it; I give it 4/5 stars.

• I hear that Jane Pratt, the founding editor of Sassy (and Jane, and xoJane, and Another Jane Pratt Thing), is in talks to revive the teen magazine, which changed my life and the lives of many others. Writes Lauren Sherman via Puck. Side note: EEEeeeeek!!!!

• I didn’t think I’d love/want a tote that looks like a chair at a Paris cafe, but turns out, I do.

• Summer is for cute little fish clutches. Especially this summer. Obviously. Also silly graphic tees with oomph.

• I have too many red shoe options, yet somehow not enough? I do fear these will go quickly. ❤️

• I pounced on these highlighter yellow shorts. They’re currently sold out, but the copper color is pretty and in stock. Some white ones left, too.

• Sunglasses with The Talented Mr. Ripley energy.

• Classic, sculptural, bohemian— all in a pair of earrings.

• Very into people learning as they go. Very into reading Kathryn Stockett’s second novel.

• Not pictured: these pants look so light and silky and of-the-moment. Reviews say they’re pretty long. I’m willing to get them hemmed. PJs I want for the shorts. Suede wraparound sandals for under $150.

• Jeni’s made new summer ice cream flavors, FYI!

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